Stand up desks: the answer to your office blues?
TODAY'S column is coming to you from a standing position. That's right, this eight-hour-a-day hunchback has invested in a stand-up desk.
Apparently sitting is the new smoking.
Research by the American Cancer Society has found women who sit for six hours or more a day have a 10% greater chance of getting cancer than women who sit for less than three hours.
But to be brutally honest, it was not the threat of cancer that was giving me the heebeejeebees. I have become paranoid that I am developing a square-shaped two-dimensional bum.
When I lie in bed at night, it's as though I can feel the parts of my derriere that are slowly turning to lifeless half-empty goon sacks.
I work in the epitome of a normal newsroom. Dozens of open plan desks packed one on top of the other, a healthy dose of "good chair" stealing and most people too busy to get out for lunch but not too busy for cat memes.
We keep our bodies still most of the time, except for our hands. It certainly isn't the hipster tech start-up company or Google-esque scene in which you might imagine a standing desk.
The first day with my new desk was very social. People would stop at my desk as though it was a bar and talk to me about what I was doing (serving drinks obviously), did the company pay for it (no) and was it tiring?
At the last question I would show them the quick release function that enables me to drop the desk back to a seated height. That's when people got really excited about it. Choice, people love choice.
But you know what people don't love? Being different.
In an office full of sitting robots with twitching hands I stood out like a hipster at a barber shop.
But wait and see… there is a whole world of people out there with sore backs and flat bums looking for ways to make the 21st century work week more sustainable.
I might not be standing alone for very long.