EDITORIAL: Thanks, that's fine, just leave it there seeing as you don't want it anymore. We'll pick it up for you.
RENOVATION and renewal is the name of the game here inside the NSW housing bubble and so in line with every other show on the telly I can now reveal my big reveal.
My plan is to build a totally eco-sustainable, non-council friendly granny flat/motel room at my place entirely out of the crap I pick up on my many walks along our once pristine beaches.
Of course I will be stuffing said flat with as many Air BnBers as I can so they can experience the rich textures and smells that are now integral to Byron Shire...apparently.
And really it's been a doddle because the amount of stuff left strewn around the place sometimes does rival your average hardware store when it comes to quality.
The walls are constructed entirely of cigarette butts, stuck together with used chewing gum and the windows are fabricated from empty beer bottles.
The curtains are crafted from the finest of discarded band aids and most of the furniture is made of coffee cups and empty food containers from all the big name fast food companies that don't have outlets here in town.
And I really want to send out a big thanks to those visitors who go to all the trouble of bringing it all the way here to throw into our bushland. It's really sped up construction.
It's finished with a carpet of discarded thongs complementing the bedding made of washed up shopping bags.
But the reason I am excited to announce I am bringing this project in early and under budget is that last weekend I found an air mattress (complete with freshly exhaled air from a bong no doubt) on the beach at Belongil.
Just need a Gideon's bible to wash up and I'll be done.