Lifestyle

Channelling the inner Manu

AFTER two hours of school holidays it had been established beyond all argument that my youngest suffers from what is termed in polite circles as "a low boredom threshold" or, as we like to call it, "holiday hypers".

This is a child who wants, expects, needs to be entertained, amused or occupied from sunrise to sunset. And all this recent wet weather combined with no school hasn't helped much.

"Mum, it's so boring, there's nothing to do."

Two minutes later and slightly louder. "Mum? Where are you? It's so boring, there's nothing to do. These holidays really suck."

More whining, a couple of drama queen sighs and the sound of something breaking and she has my attention.

"What is your problem?"

"I'm bored. There's nothing to do around here."

"Nothing to do around here? Are you kidding me? Take a look around - pick up a dust cloth or plug in the vacuum and knock yourself out."

"I don't want to dust or vacuum anything."

"No? Okay, no problem. I've got plenty more to choose from. Start with chucking on a load of washing, there are beds that need making, something sticky is stuck to the plate in the microwave that needs investigating and when you're done with that lot, feed the dog the leftovers from last night's Chinese takeaway - your father got number 24 again instead of number 26 so nobody ate much."

"Ha ha mum, you're hilarious."

"Should I take that as a no?"

I'll spare you the hissy fit details (both hers and mine) but needless to say the last words out of her mouth were, "I'm not doing housework and it's still really boring around here."

In desperation I suggested she "cook something".

"Cook?"

"Yeah, apparently people actually cook for pleasure, haven't you seen My Kitchen Rules? Go on I dare you, go against your genetics and give it a whirl."

She approached the kitchen gingerly (her DNA probably screaming in her ear to "retreat") and grabbed one of only three cookbooks I own (all gifts over the years from clueless friends).

"Mum, what's devilled crab with Nicoise salad'?"

"Out of our league."

After dismissing more than half the recipes in the cookbook as "too hard, too yucky or too many ingredients" we agreed that she could make "crispy honey chicken" for dinner. I mean what could go wrong? Chicken is nature's wonder food. You can do anything to chicken (and believe me, in my kitchen, I have) and it still comes out tasting like chicken.

Surprisingly all was going relatively well until she got to the part in the recipe where it said, "Cook, uncovered, basting with the remaining sauce for 30 minutes or until leg moves freely." We read that bit a few times and finally agreed they were referring to the chicken leg.

Almost finished, she called me over again. This time the recipe said, "Let the chicken stand for 10 minutes before serving". She couldn't get it to stand but we figured letting it lean up casually against the side of the baking dish was close enough.

The dinner was fine. The fallout in the kitchen was a whole other story. In preparing one small chook my youngest had created a bomb site that would make Beirut proud.

As I waved my hands over the scene and asked "Well, what's happening with this mess?" she replied, "Mum, doing dishes is like, so boring."

School holidays or not, there's no arguing with that logic.

Topics:  lifestyle opinion parenting


Stay Connected

Update your news preferences and get the latest news delivered to your inbox.

Road to be completely closed for works

Fifteen week road upgrade program begins

How a stranger saved a toddler from drowning

RIGHT PLACE, RIGHT TIME: Former Lismore local, Nige Smth rescued a New Caledonian toddler from drowning in the Brunswick River on January 17.

He was just waiting for his fish and chips, but now he's a hero

Safety top priority this Australia Day

Keep safe this Australia Day

Additional officers on the ground, on the water, in the air

Local Partners

Byron woman's boyfriend testifies during Bali murder trial

BYRON Bay's Sara Connor, along with her British DJ boyfriend David Taylor is facing charges of murder, fatal group assault or assault leading to death.

Comedian Damien Power becomes big hit on The Project

BIG NAME: Toowoomba comedian Damien Power will perform his new show Utopia at the Brisbane Comedy Festival in March.

The Toowoomba comedian is preparing for his most hilarious show yet

Melbourne band goes from busking to Byron stage

VISITING: Woodlock will play the Beach Hotel, Byron Bay, later this month.

Woodlock brings their new single, Something Broke That Day

'Allo 'Allo! star Gorden Kaye has died

Gorden Kaye, pictured in Brisbane in 2007, found fame as a cafe owner Rene Artois in the iconic British television series ‘Allo ‘Allo!

ACTOR Gorden Kaye, from BBC comedy ‘Allo ‘Allo!, has died.

Lion roars to straight to No 1 at Aussie box office

Nicole Kidman, David Wenham and Sunny Pawar in a scene from the movie Lion.

THE Australian-made movie a hit, while Rogue One nears record mark.

Ozzy Osbourne fell asleep during his driving test

Not a good idea to give Ozzy a Ferrari

Kristen Stewart to host SNL

Kristen Stewart will host a pre-Super Bowl episode of SNL next month

Louis Tomlinson celebrated his son's first birthday

Louis Tomlinson and Briana Jungwirth celebrate son's first birthday

Why investors are flocking to Moranbah

Moranbah homes are selling like hotcakes, creating a supply problem

Investors are scrambling to get into the market

Stockland's $150m pitch: Build it and they will come

Gladstone Marina. The Gladstone Regional Council offers a range of exciting job opportunities. Photo Contributed: Murray Ware.

Here's why we need to see Stockland upgrade start soon.

Thousands of jobs part of $1b retirement village project

THIS YEAR: An artist impression of the new Aveo retirement village in Springfield.

Aveo Springfield unveiled this month, homes ready by July

KNIFE-EDGE: The housing tightrope we now face

Even the smallest interest rate rise will be hard for some to handle.

One if five home owners at risk, according to new analysis

Historical home leaves family's hands after 75 years

SALE CONFIRMED: The Gympie Regional   Realty team which sold the Ramsey property are (back) Mel Gastigar, Dorothy Palmer and Margaret Cochrane, with (front) home seller Terri-Jayne Ramsey.

Ramsey family played a huge role in Gympie's growth.

Ready to SELL your property?

Post Your Ad Here!